you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Dude we smoked with a bunch of random stoners in a forest, then group hugged. It was the most magical thing we've ever done.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
Randomize
