U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
I will give everyone a free pointer today. Here it goes, always pee by the house late at night to avoid getting shot by drunk bastards with guns. Never go by the tree line.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
he was like the dessert in the all you can eat man buffet that has become my life.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
Yeah dude I should be out of the ER in about an hr. They gave me vallium. Go tell the captain its time to set sail.
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
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