you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
No, i know about the eggs and penis, the oh wow was for the fire
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Did a bunch of gravity bongs and am watched hours of Frozen Planet. There is nothing in the world I want more than to hug a polar bear.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
You screamed "There's a potato in my anus" and proceeded to attempt to grind with the bouncer. Also, I'm pretty sure our Chem teacher was in the same bar as us.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Would it kill us to punctuate. That last text took me 5 min to read
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
She's asleep in a fisher-price toy car
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