and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
You hooked up with a kindergarten teacher?
Yea. It's kind of weird knowing that there are kindergarten teachers out there with their nipples pierced.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I think people are normalizing furries
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
It was a crazy night: tears were shed, blood was spewed, and bottles were emptied.
Randomize
