I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
NO. NO LET HIS PENIS TOUCH YOU.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
i never thought i could drink so much vodka in 8 minutes
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
You told his date she had the tits to be a stripper and the personality to be the pole. Of course he's pissed off.
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
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