I woke up naked this morning and I found out that I thought I was Adam last night and Eve was my wife so I ran naked saying I was in the Garden of Eden and I could shit wherever I wanted.....too bad the garden was in my friends apt.......I spent the morning cleaning and have reached a new low
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I'm trying to get fucked by 4 girls here, and you're worried about verb tenses?!
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
Its pretty bad when you can tell twins apart by the size of their penises...
Randomize
