I just told her she was a heartbeat above a blowup doll.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
My phone now changes "me" to "mrrrrrrrrh", thank you new years.
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
I call bullshit
Call it what ever you want I just need to figure out how to get permanent marker off my cock
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
Randomize
