Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
he made me stop in the middle of the blowjob to turn the tv towrds him. i then proceeded when he stopped me again to get him the remote. fuck me.
two words...techno handjob
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
You want to complain about your sex life to me? Right now mine consists of trying to masturbate lightly enough not to wake her up with bed shakes. Go. Fuck. Yourself.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I just saw a woman give her infant whiskey tits. About ten minutes ago she was doing shots, and now she's breast feeding. Whiskey. Tits.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
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