How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
Thanks for feeding me more tequila shots to prevent me from trying to fight her last night. Horrible logic? Yes, but you are the best friend ever
i yelled out "tuesday" during orgasim. he fucked me into 2 days from now.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
I need to have sex with you on our hotel room window ledge... This is a need not a request.
She texted me shhh....im drunk, secret booty call...how could i say no?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
im not letting a little injury get in the way of my alcoholic/drug problems. we ARE getting turnt tonight.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
... and this time i WILL NOT make out with anyone dressed as batman.
ugh, my whole family is going ape shit over my sister's pregnancy blog. I dont get it? Anyone can get knocked up! I had rebound sex with a new york ranger last night, now that is something to fucking blog about.
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