WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
found a half eaten roll befind my toilet today. my birthday just keeps popping up.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
Theres a woman here with grey hair that im pretty sure i would have sex with
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