Well, emily woke up in Hoboken, cati woke up in jersey city, and i woke up in brooklyn....and our hotel room we rented in the city remained empty. Best birthday yet.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
Got a blowie from her in the cab on the way home. Made awkward eye contact with the cabbie who said, and I quote "Keep the mess in her mouth bro", I did so only out of respect
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
I feel like one thing if I have going for me is that my bed looks like a nice place to have sex
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
