do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
It's cold our but I feel like a very blazed penguin
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
I told him if I was pregnant we were coming out to the people at work, because I'm not pretending to get knocked up by an imaginary boyfriend.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I can't thank you enough for the well-timed blowjob. What a huge improvement in my outlook on the day.
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Then years and years after that I will send you a picture of my warped vagina from all the kids that I had.
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
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