exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
P.S. I can't hear my feet
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
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