I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
so I was at the house for 3min to grab my bathing suit & tequila. You know, the go-to weekend combination
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
That's why I don't chug things. Because when I was a freshman in college tequila came out my nose.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
please tell me he didn't just scream 'i am the yiff lord' at the cops
Randomize
