i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
You'd think me telling him that I'm a lesbian would make him realize that I don't want to hook up with him.
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
For the past year I have been the most responsible I have ever been in my entire life and now spring break is here and there is free penis just traipsing around my entire town. The game is afoot.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
No we didn't fuck. He picked me up I asked where we were going and he said "I don't know if you've ever heard of a little place called Denny's?" He was completely serious. I told him to stop the car and I got out and called Jack.
Randomize
