this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
You got cut off after you tried to make the dog funnel moscato.
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
the old man that you threw the shoe at says "hi" and many rude words...
I don't see how you can turn down creme brulee and orgasms
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Randomize
