why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
I wanted to buy shoes but nothing fit. So i'm getting a vibrator.
Randomize
