She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
I don't think he understands what an important role his penis plays in my level of self esteem
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
I was asked to be part of a mmf threesome. I think I'd rather stay home, watching Orange is the New Black and cuddle with my cat though
Randomize
