i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
The salesman looked at me like I was crazy when I explained the need for a headboard that had slats so I could handcuff people to it
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Took off my bra at the laundry mat to throw it in I am officially white trash
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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