Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
i can't wait to kiss dudes with my vampire teeth in.
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
She just used a chaser for red wine.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Just high enough for therapy.
Just to let you know... If you ever want to get me a gift, the One Direction perfume comes out soon....... It's called Our Moment. It's an appropriate gift for a 25 year old woman.
This weekend I forgot a cup, so I drank my wine out of a Pringles can. So classy. You would have been so proud.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
I just found a baklava I forgot I got last night so we can call it a day
Randomize
