No, don't ignore my call, i just need to know, whats cuter a pig in boots or a miniature horse sitting down..
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
I need to find out who his wife is so I can fuck her before he gets to mine.
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Always fun waking up to 911 as your last dialed call.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
He's only going to be gone for two weeks
That's two months in gay whore years.
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
I'm eating animal crackers on my bed next to my vibrator writing about the hopelessness and depravity of humanity. I am LIVING.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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