i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
you turned your livingroom into a bong?
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
How was your weekend?
My girlfriend decided the best way to get my mind off of my dog dying was to break up with me via text
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