dude your alot more fun to hang out around now that your addicted to coke...but seriously you need to stop
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
So. Much. Sex. I feel like i ran a marathon then someone kicked me in the vagina. Soo worth it
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
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