I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I looked at him all bewildered and he said, "what? I figured if it was under 30 seconds it'd be free."
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
i remember you telling me to take a shower, brush my teeth, go get back in bed w her, and "just do what i was born to do." and as soon as i stopped yacking i did just that. you saved my birthday.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I just wanted to personally thank you for throwing clementine slivers at me across the room while we made out
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
