hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
so then she threw up in his asshole
yep..that'll do it.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Do you ever look at a vegetable and think "that would be awesome to shove up my vagina"?
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
So how do we make 4/20 better than every other day we are stoned?
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
Just found dollar bills in my sheets. What part of the weekend am I forgetting?
Ew. He is mine. We all know that if he has a mid-life crisis and decides to sleep with a student, I AM THAT STUDENT. She's not friends with him on FB. Reassuring.
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
He was so traumatized by the It's a small world ride but he immediately pulled out a flask from god-knows-where and got drunk before the ride was over. The ride operator didn't blame him.
Randomize
