I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
Our cab driver just admitted to beating up kids in the 60's who didn't smoke pot...
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Between the puerto rican elf, the fat marine, the deaf guy and the ex coke head I've got a good preview if the men in this city...
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
MIDGETS
????
Just watched a guy open his car door, puke, close it, and resume driving. Happy Monday.
Randomize
