she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
I learned the names of so many hookups when they read them at graduation
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
My mom slipped a condom in my pocket along with a sticky note that said "be safe sweetie."
HELP THE ONLY THING THAT'S HELPING ME DISTINGUISH BETWEEN THE TWO OF THEM IS THE DIRECTION OF THEIR WINKY FACES OMFG
Mom called her a cunt. I think that's code for "don't bring her over ever again."
I just threw up all of my lunch in the Barnes & Nobles parking lot. Rockbottom tastes like a veggie burger, in case you were wondering.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
Randomize
