I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
If I could pick any std, I would pick genital herpes. Seriously. Have you seen the commercials? The lady is riding a fucking bike, swimming, and on a date. I have a perfectly fine vag and all I do is go to the library.
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Question: Is it too early to claim April Fools on the text "can we do some lines before the concert" that I accidentally sent Mom?
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
Mom just Facebook checked into an Applebees at 2am. Caption: ''WITH THE BESTIEZ.''
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
He doesn't wear a seatbelt. He votes Republican. He has a small dick. That house of cards just fell apart.
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
I'm not saying you're stupid, just that you have bad luck when thinking...
Randomize
