the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
Just bought a handle of vodka with the excuse of "just in case we drink tonight"
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I am downstairs in the bar now having a beer...actually I ordered two beers and placed one across from me in front of an open chair. I did this for appearance sake, so nobody knew I was double fisting all alone. I'm getting hungry now. I'm thinking of ordering two meals just to keep appearances up.
Just want to apologize again for asking to spot your form in the shower.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Just don't have sex while watching Home Alone. It will ruin Christmas for you.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Randomize
