Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
I used the picture of my mom and I doing blow job shots in Vegas in the presentation for my Spanish final. Graduation here I come.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
While I was fucking him, he grabbed a taco off his shelf and started eating it. I had taco dripped on me. I have no idea where the taco came from.
Bro, she used the potato bongs to make French fries after. She's deff a keeper.
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
I just used a baby fork as a roach clip. I am totally the cool aunt.
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Of course he’s picking me up at the airport. I taught him the Lotus position last time we had sex.
Randomize
