so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
fuck your need to drink for whitney a thousand times last night.
This football player keeps talking about his drunk dad. I think he may start crying. Does this deserve a roll tide?
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
It could be worse. I was dumped by a guy in a kilt after he gave my shoes away on St. Patrick's Day.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
DUDE NEVER CALL THE COPS BACK
Long story short I shit on a sidewalk while walking with multiple people. Then sprinted around the streets of Tallahassee in only gym shorts as I tore my toga off and wore it as a cape.
I'm not saying I'm planning to hook up tomorrow but I'm also not saying I'm unprepared for it
Randomize
