Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
I think it's starting to become crucial that I find a companion for my vagina.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
Sometimes a girl needs 4 shots of whiskey in her diet coke at 5 in the afternoon and i feel no shame in admitting that girl is me
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
