Your mouth is God's brothel.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Apparently, we were running around the apartment, singing into pickles, the routinely slapped our passed out friends with them.
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
She had never heard the term "grundle" before. Classiest girl I've met in months
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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