I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Im about to embark on a date with someone who shit in my car. How did this become my life?
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
After my lunch today, I've got $10 till Sunday night. I am losing at life.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
Your english degree would kill itself if it could read that text.
maybe a couloe typos.. noooooooooo big deal
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
