Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I'm not coming to work today because tequila
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
I would ride that face into the sunset
Randomize
