it's to the point where working 2 jobs this summer will absolutely not cover how much i will spend on alcohol next semester.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Its people like u that make people like me go to rehab. He has a lazy eye for christ sakes.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
He paid the bartender with money from the tip jar then proceeded to hit on me in front of my date. I love frat dances
Next time you see his dad you should let him know you are now Eskimo brothers.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
Randomize
