Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
i could have sworn she did an overextended split with her legs over her head but now i think it was just the drugs
I won't go into too much detail about this but you should probably wash your sheets. In bleach. Or just burn them. Thanks for letting me sleep in your bed bro. Enjoy scotland.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
How many ballsacks did you see last night because I saw eight
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
To be honest. I have two poptarts in my jacket pockets. No one knows. I am pro stealth.
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Just had to tell a NYC cop I was doing the Dougie in a houndstooth jumper so he could find me in the security video.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
