I swear to god Optimus Prime and Megatron are fighting in my head right now.
i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
At some point during thanksgiving the image of me pooping on ur moms chest will come to you. Your welcome!
You know you're hung-over when you're smoking and have the strong urge to eat the cigarette. No more buckets of gin. No. More. Ever.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
I was just asked by a police officer to not come back to Lancaster...
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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