Sponge bath it is.
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
I thought I would be a proper lady and put my spare panties in a ziplock
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Randomize
