break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
I'm at a work party and I don't know how to drink socially. You know, like slow?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
if you wouldnt have been fucking me hard and crazy like that then my bed wouldn't have broke. you owe me 600.
so you admit it was good then??
I made my rape whistle into a roach clip device. FRESHMAN YEAR!
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
Like wrapping my dick in silk, wrapping that in velvet, and putting it in a cloud. A warm, tight, wet cloud.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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