Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
yeah but it's new years. they should arrest people for being sober that day.
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
THE CONDOM ONLY COVERS HALF OF HIS DICK I AM IN THE BATHROOM PANICKING
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
Found another bruise from Saturday #stopliquor2014
You're acting like you didn't chug fireball, like duh you have bruises you drunk betch
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Come as you are, bitch. Glitter and vodka provided.
Randomize
