Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
I'm wearing boardshorts as underwear to work. This is bachelorhood
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
Can we make a sex game out of monopoly somehow?
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Drunk Karaoke resulted in only 8 injuries this time, so there is some improvement.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
You shoulda seen me try and clean up custard from an eclair off the floor while trying to pretend to be sober for my mom. Fucking hilarious.
Randomize
