They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Apparently I farted on her in my sleep. Then, just to be sure she was cool, I did it again on purpose and she didnt say anything. So, WIN?
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
You actually went to class. Im eating dry cereal naked and watching bring it on.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
It feels like a bunch of leprechauns are using my brain as a soccer ball
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
