I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Tuesday night just isn't my ideal coke binge night.
Good morning! Spongebob is on channel 257 when you wake up. Help yourself to breakfast. You were great last night. See you when i get back.
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
New guy at the liquor store was inexplicably fascinated by our huge jug of williams. First he said what are you gonna mix THAT with? and looked confused when I said air.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
I can't believe I slept with a girl who has the words shucks in her vocabulary. I'm getting less picky by the day..
Randomize
