he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
Whales. Broccoli little trees giant. Magic in cat form. I want my loco and juice. Black in shower. Brb remember life.
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
i dont know whats worse..that i woke up in a gorilla suit or that its covered in peanut butter
When we got home I apparently addressed everyone as 'peasant' since it was my birthday, this followed by me demanding for my "peasants to wash me".
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
