Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
When I realized it was a dog, and I still had a boner, it was awkward.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
I shit you not ... they just advertised a recruiting service for strippers at this concert.
So guess who got away with telling their girlfriend she's insane multiple times in a Valentine's day card. Yup, this guy.
I woke up this morning with a sharpie tramp stamp. Pretty sure it's a picture of a squirrel.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Randomize
