last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
what is college for if not random hookup sex?
learning.
i would literally fuck learning if i could.
Intervention is following me on twitter.
wow.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
If my dick was big enough to fuck the eye of a hurricane, I would.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
Just realized how behind i am. Will gradually increase drinking until i don't remember that i missed an entire year of class.
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
Randomize
