I would drag my balls through a mile of broken glass to eat pudding out of her anus
Looks like I will be paying for the roofie I slipped myself in 9 months.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
through my window right now you can see the hot chick next door is standing BUTT ASS NAKED eating peanut butter off a knife.
ill be there in 5.
Just saw a white bronco on my way home from work and the license plate said "NOT OJ"
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I think I'm going to contact pbr and see if they'll sponsor our dreams
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
We got really excited for country fried steak then we had sex.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
