there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
his dog just threw up on me too. its like im a throwup magnet to that family.
Cute you're picking friends over dick. I feel like this is the trailer for a lifetime movie.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
Dude my triple a card is good for bail. This is like a real live get out of jail free card
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
just start off by saying "hey, i cockblocked my friend last night and need to make it up to him, could you help?"
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
That's the fall semester you first snorted drugs off my ass I think
I'm highly inebriated watching star wars, this text was sent via the force
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
On another note I am sitting in my bed naked, buzzed, and working on a notecard for my 8:00am test tomorrow. I think I need to make better choices.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
Randomize
