Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
I wish I'd realized he looked like Skrillex before I was already in the middle of fucking him...
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
